Friday, March 25, 2016

To kid.

[OLD. Previously written early to mid February]

Did a pregnancy scare change my mind on having a kid of my own?  I'm currently a week late.  Semi freaking out.  I'm not ready but I'm in denial and am thinking it will come. 

It will.  It has to.

I never thought I was invincible to pregnancy but in the last decade I've never been in this situation. 

My stance on kids are simple.  I'm not ready.  I don't have a steady job, I'm back living with my parents, I am not in a relationship.  I never saw myself having a child, I couldn't picture it but now.. this weird feeling is happening.

I always thought I'd get an abortion.  I should.  I can't raise a child when I can't take care of myself.  If I had a career and able to pay my own rent, that would change the game.  Or would it?

My mind is blank but I'm also spinning in circles.

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